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 11.12.04 - 4:29 pm Howdy, ya'll! I feel like a big bag of disease! Yeah, I'm still all coughy and sniffling. Ha, I've been trying not to spend money on unnecessary items, so what do I do? I went into a comic book shop to buy some plastic covers for a few books (they help keep comics from getting bent up, sticking together, etc.), and I end up buying a $20 figurine. Dammit! But it's really so cool I had to get it- it's a Japanese import figure of Poison Ivy. It's wicked sweet; she stands on a tropical-looking base with two venus fly traps by her side. Her arms are lifted and these little vines wrap around her like she's commanding them to come to life O_o Like I said, totally cool! My sister called me today. She said that she woke up this morning at 7am and saw a bald guy she had never seen before, standing in her dorm room wearing only a towel, and he was PISSING ON HER CARPET! She started screaming at him, which woke up her roommate, who then joined in with the screaming and freaking out. Turns out he was a drunk army guy who was visiting a girl who live on that floor. He wandered into their room because the door hadn't locked. See, Ab has problems with her door; it's supposed to lock automatically, but sometimes it doesn't. Anyways, the drunk was returned to his host's room where he slept for a few hours till he sobered up. He was sort of apologetic (he said he couldn't remember the incident- that's no excuse, asshole!), and removed the carpet, and paid my sis $70 to cover her carpet. My sister half-heartedly thanked him for his cooperation, and gave him a sharp lecture on drinking and responsibility (btw, he was only 19). I feel bad for poor Ab and her roommate; but on the other hand, it will be a classic story that they'll enjoy telling their pals a few years from now :) And now for something completely different!!! *wide grin* I have seen so many wimpy, crappy-ass excuses for poems lately that I, Kalisa, decided write the most heartless poem to ever grace the, uh, pages of, um, anything! Here we go! You feel. Pain. Sadness. Loneliness. Desperation. You. You suck. I laugh at you, You dumb crybaby. Come to me, So that I may kick your ass. You are pathetic. Get a life. Grow a spine, You big wimp. Damn, aren't I deep? HA! Well, before you doubt my mighty talent, did you notice how I shaped the poem into a christmas tree? You are impressed, I know! Mmm... this could become a hobby for me, writing mean-spirited little poems (I use that word loosely) into pictures. Cool! I rock! Ah! My pal Em and I decided to make a song called "Dead Baby Pool Party". In the event that it would be turned into a music video, here's my vision of how it would look. Music starts. Front of the pool camera view- you see an infant crawl over to the side of a pool. It leans too far over and falls in. Underwater scene- the baby starts to sink, and bubbles come out of its mouth. Maybe the bubbles form words like, "Hey, what's going on?" or "Ooops, I forgot my swimming diapers." or "Haha, I go peepee now.", stuff like that. Above the pool view- sad music plays as you see the baby sink farther and farther down, in a spiral motion (cause that would make it funnier somehow). Original front of pool view- slowly the baby bobs back up to the surface, face down. Then, cool spooky music starts as one-by-one, more babies float to the pool surface! All the babies somehow swim to the sides of the pool, pull themselves out, and crawl to the left or right till they are out of the camera view. Only the original baby remains in the center. View of doorway, calm music plays as baby's mom enters pool room, starts saying asinine like "Are you in here, baby?" and then (insert frantic music) starts screaming as camera shows dead baby floatin' in the center of pool. Doorway view as baby's dad rushes to wife's side, and camera follows them as they rush to the pool. Dad jumps in and pulls baby out as mom stands there crying and being useless. Both parents kneel and lean over baby (camera view above their shoulders looking down, tragic music goes here). They are crying and stuff. Dad pulls baby to his chest. Camera view changes for a second as you see the baby's eye jerk open- its eye is all black and sinister or something (quick insert of shocking, horror music here). Camera view goes back to above parents' shoulders, and baby comes to life in full zombie terror mode, and it bites dad's throat open. (Now I will ignore the camera angles and music.) Dad falls back as blood gushes from his throat. Mom starts screaming, while behind her all the other dead babies crawl out of their hiding places. Original dead baby, covered in dad's blood, starts crawling towards her. She scoots back away from it as the other babies crawl towards her. She turns away from original dead baby to escape, only to see the evil horde of dead babies is upon her. She starts to scream again, but it is a short scream because the babies somehow shoot through the air onto her body and rip her throat open and tear her body up with their teeth. Then the bloody zombie babies stand up on their wobbly legs and start dancing for a bit (the main theme of the dead baby pool party song will go here), and then they leave the pool room to go kill other people. Scenes of zombie babies attacking and killing people (and maybe a few animals for the sake of variety) all over the city. Finally, there are corpses all over the place, and the dead babies all dance some more (insert main theme). Wow! This has got to be one of the longest entries I've ever made! Good for me. Quiz Time!  You are Alex from A Clockwork Orange. You are just a wee little schoolboy who enjoys Beethoven and ultraviolence. Your attitude towards life could be described as psychopathic optimism. Which Cool Evil Guy Are You? brought to you by Quizilla Back & Forth Previous Adventures of Doom! Villains need to eat too (unless they are robots, of course). - 11.27.05 Tips for making laundry easy. - 11.23.05 Detroit museums and baklava. - 11.20.05 My affair with the Scotch Craft Stick. - 11.18.05 |
